How To Be Successful

My dad did everything he could think of to be successful. It mainly consisted of going to work early and coming home late, going to church on Sunday, and loving football. In Mississippi, that’s what most people considered enough. It used to really bother him that guys with what he considered absolutely insane lifestyles were making more money than he did. He would always say, “That’s just how it is,” but you could tell it bothered him.

There was a guy, I’m not going to say what type of business he was in because that would identify him, but he was enormously successful in his business. He was enormously successful for Jackson and for Mississippi, and everybody knew it. Everybody wanted him on his board, and he served on some of Mississippi's most important, highest-paying boards. Everybody respected his opinion, and everybody invited him to their parties.

That being said, he never kept regular working hours. He would often show up at noon and work until midnight. Being a night owl myself, I would often see him getting a refreshing beverage after leaving the office just before midnight. I loved him to death, but not in the ways some people did.

He loved his wife and did all he could to provide a happy life and successful social life, which was important to her. He was also flagrantly, but not openly bisexual. You couldn’t be openly bisexual in Mississippi at the time. I’m not sure you can now. It wasn’t exactly a secret. Everybody knew it, but nobody ever admitted it, at least not openly. I saw some of the young men he was rumored to be attached to. They were beautiful enough to make you understand why he might occasionally cross that Rubicon, but he always crossed back to his wife.

Besides affairs of the heart, he was one of Mississippi’s most famous gamblers. One time, he lost an entire house in Eastover in a bet with Mississippi’s most famous pornographer, who then deeded the house to a guy who took all the legal heat in one of his pornographic (but illegal) adventures. Pretty soon, my friend had a new house in Eastover and one in the burgeoning gated communities of Madison County. I don’t know how he got them, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t related to getting up early and going to church on Sundays.

Success in life probably should be related to working hard and acting right, but it’s not. You can work yourself to death and follow every social norm to the letter and still not be half as successful as this guy. He was a brilliant guy, and did a lot of good for Mississippi, but if you ever tried to live the way he did, your momma would be shocked.